CLASSES & JOBS

Being a woman means different things to each woman, but there are some things we can all relate to, and probably wish we did not understand so well.

Kvetching about “that time of the month” was something that happened occasionally between my female roommates and me. This is my all-time favorite from our griping sessions. (Note: names have been changed to protect, umm, mostly me, since I did not ask if I could share these stories.)
Connie tells of a lecture she attended where a male teacher was detailing the biological facts of a female menstrual cycle. Matter of factly, he commented that the “uterus lining sloughs itself off and…” He did not get to finish this sentence because Connie, at the word “sloughs”, immediately yelled out, “Sloughs itself off??? SLOUGHS itself off? Try RIPS itself from inside and TEARS its way down!” Hopefully the professor learned his lesson and was not so casual in his approach the next time he lectured on the subject.

Another college roommate, Lydia, was buying tampons at the store. As luck would have it, for some reason the scanner would not register the price. The clerk called out over the loudspeakers with a harsh nasal intonation, “I need a price check on Tampax.” The reply, from a man who had no experience with this product, and was trying to make sense of the brand name, clearly showed that he thought the clerk asked about ‘thumbtacks’, “Is that the kind you put in with your thumb or with a hammer?” My ultra-shy friend had one of those I-wish-I-could-bury-myself-in-a-hole-right-now moments. It was a long time before she could laugh about this transaction. Ah, the joys of certain elements of womanhood! Good thing it is not like that all the time, eh?

The end goal for most students is to join the workforce. Gone are the days of the Renaissance Man, when knowledge was valuable for its own sake. Also, at that point, it was humanly possible to know all that was known and to read all that had been written (in English, anyway). Now, however, education is a means to an end, and that ‘end,’ i.e. job, requires joining the rat race along with everyone else.

Many want to skip the step of preparation and go straight to success. Ah, come on, who does not secretly wish for this? What computer programmer wouldn’t want to be the next Bill Gates? What skateboarder does not wish to have the success and popularity of Tony Hawk? However, it is not necessary to be outrageously wealthy or famous to be happy with your career. You can, as the song says, whistle while you work, as long as you have the right attitude.

The steps to job satisfaction are simple, but hard to master. Number one: get the training that will make you marketable. You don’t have to be a doctor or lawyer to earn a good living. Plumbers make plenty of money, and are always needed. Number two: Have a positive outlook about your skills and your profession. We all eat out, and a well-managed restaurant will keep customers coming back, so put a smile on and be a darned good restaurant manager if that is where your career path takes you! Number three: Be happy with the knowledge that you are employed, no matter that your job is not glamorous, exciting or even particularly fulfilling. Don’t fall for the “if you’re not fulfilled, you’re in the wrong place” line. Fulfillment is in the eye of the beholder, and being grateful you can pay your bills and drive to work goes a long way toward your personal job satisfaction.

The year before I graduated from college, I began interviewing for jobs. With a solid degree soon to be behind me, and enough excitement and anticipation to last a lifetime, I continued on in the job search. After a series of five interviews with one particular company, I received a call in which they asked me to come out for a final interview at their headquarters. Of the initial candidates, it was down to just four of us vying for that spot. Each of us would be flying out to their offices for the interview. Since my flight was only an hour long, my travel plans were set up so that I would fly out in the morning and go directly from the airport to the interview. I would then have an evening flight and come back home after my interview was over. I liked the idea of not having to pack for a trip. I could focus on my interview and would only be gone for the day. I was so nervous and excited all at the same time.

I chose to wear my brand new Banana Republic suit. To go with the black dress pants and fitted jacket, I picked out some stilettos and a super cute shirt to go underneath. I then headed out to the airport. In my rush to get out there for my early flight, I didn’t have time to stop for food. So, I picked up a drink and a bagel with cream cheese at the terminal. All ready to go, I found my seat on the plane and let out a sigh of relief. I could now relax for an hour or so and finish up my last preparations for the interview. My open bagel and cream cheese looked delicious and I so I picked it up to have my first bite. Yep, you guessed it - the bagel slipped right out of my hand and landed face down on my brand new outfit - jacket and pants together. Cream cheese everywhere! “Are you kidding me?” I thought. I about died. Since stuff like that doesn’t seem to happen to me often, I sat there for a second in complete shock and denial. “Seriously?” I thought. But there I was, with cream cheese smeared all over my new suit - and even worse, a very important interview ahead… and no backup clothing options!

The bad luck continued when I discovered that my suit happened to be made of what could very well be the least cream-cheese-repellent material possible. It would NOT come out. It took me the entire flight to get that stuff off - and it still didn’t come out completely. I could still see the faint evidence of my breakfast on my suit even as I waited in line to meet with my interviewer. I sat there feeling frazzled and nervous - the furthest thing from relaxed.

However, the minute I realized that my interviewer (and potential manager) hadn’t seemed to notice my jacket, I was somehow able to snap into “interview mode” and get through the entire thing. I flew home that afternoon, laughing at myself, my bad luck, and wondering how my interview went. You can imagine my shock when I received a call later that night and learned that I had actually gotten the job. What are the odds? Maybe a bagel and cream cheese is good luck after all.

Interview Advice from the top - Learn how to present yourself and perform at job interviews to land the job you really want. Top-level advice from a true expert in the field.

Cardio training is a great way to get in shape and increase your lung capacity. I just found out how much fun riding a bike can be last summer. I started road biking last summer when I had surgery on my knee and couldn’t run. I just wanted some way to stay in shape but I found a fun hobby and great mode of transportation as well. I had forgotten how great riding a bike could be.

Before I was old enough to drive I rode my bike everywhere; to friends houses, to the beach, or out to eat. Last summer I relived my childhood while getting in great shape. I figured out that if I just left a little earlier than I would in a car I could go places without buying gas, and while getting an amazing cardio workout- two amazing benefits, and it’s fun! Whatever type of cardio you choose to do, whether biking, hiking, running or swimming, remember that cardio is an important part of staying healthy and happy!

Don’t you just wish real life was more like your computer? Think of the advantages!

You don’t have to deal with it until it’s up and running. No second guessing - it is either on or off, no in between. When it asks, “Did you really mean to close out” and you select ‘Yes,’ that’s it - no more banter - no more wheedling or whining - it shuts itself off at your request. When you mistype or make any kind of error, just hit “Undo,” or “Control-Alt-Delete,” and the mistake never happened! Whew - what a relief. It will not wither, or complain, or walk out if you do not give it enough attention. It also does not complain that it is being smothered by perhaps a little too much time and interest. It does not care if you prefer the mouse, or if you are a keypad typist only. It just does not matter. Ahhhhh, the computer, now if only we had an escape button from reality. . .